shutting down in 1:45. / kasane teto

u_u lyrics: i've got just 1:45 and although i've gotta try to become a thing that i'm not repulsed by breathing like it's being put to good use, like there's something i can do to recover all the pieces of my form "end task" to the endless monotony of dread "empty cache" to that ever-rising overuse of RAM alt-tab to a change in my state machine mind to find that it's not responding at all i could/couldn't ever not though keep flipping from 1 to 0 too soon for forever idle how could i not be afraid? begin the shutdown if it's a bug, how could you see that this feels like the end for i'm sick, sixty-seven on the clock can i force myself to stall? could i stop another wire from snapping screaming like you're gonna hear it pleading with the faulty circuits like i can fix it, good as new new output: hey, hey hey hey i wanna be a better me oh no way i wanna be another me oh no-oh way oh no way in the time that's left is there another thing to be? i thought 0:39 would be the end finished up the script, hit send but according to the integrity report i couldn't fix all my parts and hit by another surging spark, there's a single program left transposing: hey, hey hey hey if this is really how i feel why why why's this gotta be my final plea woah oh no way oh no way i feel the processes of me begin to close as my fans slow down and the temps go up quieting their whirr it's like a heartbeat forced to (stop) - stopped common crash when moving files - added new features this must be my life flashing before my drives and the disk starts to write as consciousness begins to fade, i wanna know i feel cold, but is that even possible? then something new, something new! "it was just a normal update, what is wrong with you?" instrumental/audio download: https://www.mediafire.com/folder/mn0qkujx5ponx/shutdown_in_1_45 note that it's 200bpm and starts 1 32nd note before the song really begins. i probably should've extended that to a full measure so you wouldn't have to edit it in a DAW or something before making covers in some software... oops! I think we all have some tendency to catastrophize, though some do it more than others. I've dealt with fairly intense anxiety for a while, which is a big reason why I haven't reached out to many other producers in the vocal synth scene (though I'd like to!). All I can say if you're dealing with this kind of thing is that you're not alone. If we keep walking, we'll reach our destination sooner or later; if we look back, take pride in how far we've come! -gloop