Suicide Note (OCD) // (Ft. Kasane Teto SV2)【SynthV Original】 (重音テトSV2)

#kasaneteto #重音テト #synthv #ボカロ #ボカロ曲 #ボーカロイド "Individuals with OCD are five times more likely to attempt suicide, and ten times more likely to die from suicide than the general population." - The Swedish National Patient Register https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27431293/ 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or text 988. Available 24/7, free and confidential. https://988lifeline.org/ Crisis Text Line: Text "HOME" to 741741. Free, 24/7 text-based crisis support. https://www.crisistextline.org/ International OCD Foundation: https://iocdf.org/ Resource directory to find OCD specialists and therapists near you. Content warning: This song contains suicidal ideation, mental illness(OCD), and depictions of suicide. Viewer Discretion is advised. Bandcamp: https://reclaimantoflife.bandcamp.com/album/suicide-note-ocd Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/0nigLHnIsqC4p2cmoB4JWp Music, Arrangement, Lyrics, & Mixing: Reclaimant of Life (Dylan Wong) Artwork: 巣鴨: https://x.com/illu_kamo Vocals: Kasane Teto SV2 #重音テトSV2 Made with REAPER Mastered with Matchering V2 SVPs: https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/139JWtKGpTNTTXBUFiIpDk03sXeo4Tzxb If you want to cover this song or translate it into other languages, please contact me at wongwc1998@gmail.com. This song is about the suicidal thoughts stemming from my OCD. I hesitated a lot about whether I should finish this song. I thought it'd be too disturbing, but I decided to go ahead and do it. Current depictions of OCD sucks. I thought I didn’t have OCD because my room is dirty. I've gotten better now that I'm on Cipralex/Lexapro and ERP. (Longer description in comments) Lyrics: [Verse 1] If you're reading this, I'm no longer here. Didn't know why I kept living for thirty-one years. Unwanted thoughts kept having their way with my head. They told me that the world would be safer if I were dead. I was hardly functioning, living a lie. Had a lot of close calls. I barely got by. I spent every second making sure nothing's wrong. It didn't work at all. I was still scared all day long. [Pre-chorus 1] I couldn't live with all the evil possibilities. I couldn't stand the disgusting uncertainties. Why is it that I should believe I'll be happy, When these fears have so completely swallowed me? [Chorus 1] I can't stand that I might hurt you unknowingly. I can't live with the fact that there's nothing stopping me. I fooled myself that if I lived one more day, All this pain would go away. But it's here to stay. I must have written this same note so many times. I'm drowning alone. There's no lifeboat I can climb. To everyone who's helped me. You didn't fail. I couldn't be saved. I guess I was just too frail. [Verse 2] If you're reading this, I'm no longer here. Didn't know why I kept living for thirty-one years. Maybe I've hurt you all too much. But I couldn't see. Everyone's speaking in lines these autistic eyes can't read. Maybe you all want me gone, but I couldn't read the room. My ADHD makes mistakes. Who am I to presume? Maybe now I'm dead, you're opening bottles of champagne. You all hate me, but didn't want to say it to my face. [Pre-chorus 2] I couldn't live with all the evil possibilities. I couldn't stand the disgusting uncertainties. Why is it that I should believe I'll be happy, When these fears have so completely swallowed me? [Chorus 2] I can't stand that I might hurt you unknowingly. I can't live with the fact that there's nothing stopping me. I fooled myself that if I lived one more day, All this pain would go away. But it's here to stay. I must have written this same note so many times. I'm drowning alone. There's no lifeboat I can climb. To everyone who's helped me. You didn't fail. I couldn't be saved. I guess I was just too frail. [Bridge] In my next life, I want to be reborn as a fool, I don't care if I'll be a joke or somebody's tool. I want to live just one day, without a fright. I want to laugh senselessly, day and night. I don't want this autistic OCD brain, It's brought me nothing but all this pain. I'm scared. I don't want to die. But, I just want the world to be quiet. [Chorus 3] I can't stand that I might hurt you unknowingly. I can't live with the fact that there's nothing stopping me. I fooled myself that if I lived one more day, All this pain would go away. But it's here to stay. I must have written this same note so many times. I'm drowning alone. There's no lifeboat I can climb. To everyone who's helped me. You didn't fail. I couldn't be saved. I guess I was just too frail. [Outro] I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. I just want the world to be quiet. 0:00 Content Warning 0:18 Verse 1 1:09 Pre-chorus 1 1:36 Chorus 1 2:28 Verse 2 3:45 Pre-chorus 2 4:19 Chorus 2 5:09 Bridge 6:01 Chorus 3 6:50 Outro